How to make your thing a ‘thing’

Have you ever heard anyone say, “That is not a thing“? In this context, a thing refers to a generally accepted concept with which people are familiar either in popular culture or some other subculture or academic area. A thing should be instantly recognizable among the group of people to whom it pertains. A “household name”, if you will.

Some examples of Julie Andrews’ favorite things include “Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens”, “Bright copper kettles and warm woollen mittens”. She enumerates quite a few more in the lovely movie, The Sound of Music, which itself is a thing.

Some examples of my favorite things are Rocky Road ice cream, peanut butter, just about anything chocolate, movies, writing blog posts…

So, how does something become a thing? I mean, who gets to decide if a thing is a thing or not?

Well, you can decide for yourself if these items below really are things:

• Cameras which capture smells
• 3-D printed clothing
• Car wash style toothbrush
• Toast launcher
• Edible cups
• Bacon machine

People who invent or popularize things usually benefit quite tremendously from them. Think J.K. Rowling, Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey. The things these people are responsible for have improved the lives of millions of people and returned enormous value to their creators. So how does anybody turn something into a thing?

How to make your thing a ‘thing’

First you need to figure out what your thing is. If you’re still not sure, my book can help you figure out what your thing might be.

Next, you must understand what almost all things have in common. They’re elaborately formalized with their own well-documented concepts, principles, vocabulary, taxonomy, historical or fictional context, hierarchy, framework, business structures, philosophical or technological underpinnings etc. etc. etc. The more elaborate, the better. Each of these could be discussed in detail but one of my favorite aspects is…

Names!

The more names your thing has in it, the more thingy it is. Your degree of familiarity with any thing is proportional to the total number of associated names you can remember and explain. How well do you know your cat? T.S. Eliot claims that all cats have three names! In Ursula K. Le Guin’s famous Earthsea series, wizards study the “true names” of things in order to control them as if they can somehow access the essence through the name. Giving something a unique name is the first step in distinguishing it from other things. Then it’s just a matter of describing its attributes and actions.

The main reason I’m writing this blog post is to show you how namey all these things are. Take a look at all these things and their glorious names. My intention, when you look at these links below, is for you to say to yourself, “Wow, these things sure do have a lot of interesting names in them!”

• 10th Planet Jiu Jitsu
• Star Wars
• Lord of the Rings
• Pokémon
• Marvel Comics
• ISO 9000
• Catholic Church
• United States Constitution
• Python
• Starbucks
• Engineering

A thing can be a “body of work” like the King Crimson albums, Clifford Pickover’s books, or Pablo Amaringo’s art. Or it can be something else wildly popular like In-N-Out burgers, or Ben & Jerry’s ice creams, all of which have unique and creative names. It can also be a series or collection. People love collecting things and possessing all the volumes of a series, like trilogies. LeGuin also once wrote that “endemic trilogitis” must’ve begun with the Lord of the Rings series. Lots of stories are presented in trilogies or series. Not only is possessing all the components of a compelling series fun, it makes the owner feel like an authority!

Membership Dues

A well-designed thing is like an exclusive club with membership dues. Star Wars fans, Catholics, jiu jitsu practitioners and computer programmers all have to put in an initial investment of time and energy to learn the ins and outs of their respective thing ecosystems before they can be considered true initiates. Once you’ve paid your dues by learning a lot about a thing, you can then nerd out with other fans or practitioners using the unique shared vocabulary and concepts. Good things allow fans to take them in unique directions like writing fan fiction or creating novel engineering methods or Starbucks drinks.

Just think about how many people can explain Star Wars, Marvel movies, Pokémon, and other popular things in enormous detail. Those fans latch onto their favorite things with great enthusiasm because the thingy ecosystem becomes a part of their life. Star Trek fans, for example, re-watch all the various series and movies, collect the toys, and attend Star Trek conventions in cosplay outfits. Can you imagine writing a book so popular that one day you’re going for a walk somewhere and you see people dressed up as the characters you invented? Or wearing your t-shirts?

“Fu***** Awesome Test”

Okay, so let’s say you start developing something. How do you know if it’s good enough? Well, it has to pass the “Fu***** Awesome Test”. This test can apply to evaluating anything you create: a story, artwork, a website, a computer program, anything. What you have to do is read the name aloud (or appreciate your creation according to what it is) and consider how you feel about it. In your heart of hearts, you need to feel like, “That’s fu***** awesome!!!” If you don’t feel that way, it’s probably not ready. Let your creation rest for a few days or weeks and return to it. If you still feel same way about it, then it’s ready. Looking at it again a little more objectively should still stir up the same feelings in you. If you feel less than fully enthusiastic the second time around, you have to go back to the drawing board. Be honest with yourself. You know if it’s “fu***** awesome” or not. I didn’t say this was going to be easy.

Pre-Thing World

One theory of time travel says that once time machines are invented, people won’t be able to go back in time before the time the first machine was invented. All creators of things carved their own paths starting in their pre-thing environment. There were science fiction space stories before Star Wars, but that movie single-handedly raised the bar for that genre. Most young Star Wars fans can’t imagine a world without Star Wars, but that’s the world George Lucas lived in when he created it. If you haven’t created your thing yet, you’re in the same pre-thing world he was in.

You’re likely familiar with many such things and probably recognize the majority I mention here, but have you ever thought to invent something with its own unique, elaborate concepts, taxonomy, and ecosystem? What self-contained systems will you develop or build upon? What universes or realms will you define, document, map out, and then describe in detail? What previously loosely defined concepts or pedagogies will you curate and consolidate? What comprehensive seminal documents will you draft which will form the basis for a way of living or managing some aspect of human life?

The greatest things gain the ability to outlast their creators. A thing is not really a thing if it begins and ends with you. True things can be passed on to future generations who can continue to either build upon them or gain inspiration from them. If you haven’t created your thing yet, you’re in a similar position to the one Gene Roddenberry, Margaret Atwood, John Muir, Frank Lloyd Wright, and Romare Bearden found themselves in just before they began the work for which they are known.